To teach a man to fish, you have to KNOW how to fish already, don’t you? What’s a girl to do who doesn’t know how? There are lots of things I can teach someone to do, and at least one or two of them may even be useful.
But what of that stuff I can’t? I’m serious. What about the stuff I never bothered to learn? How do I teach my kids the things I know are important that I don’t already know how to do?
You wanna know what fear is? Look into my heart and eyes at moments like this, when I see something happening to my kids, or see them struggling and see where it could lead in the future and I know they don’t know it because I never showed them how, and knowing it’s because I didn’t know how myself.
Because that’s the job. Teaching these little people who look at you, turn to you, people you made so blindly, not knowing what you didn’t know. If I were my boss here, I’d fire me most days. Other days I would give that girl a raise, a hug, and even a high five or two.
But when you look into the abyss, and see the ignorance you didn’t even understand was there before, you can’t run from it. And I swear to each of you reading this, and to the Big Kahuna out there, I will try to learn. I Believe when you know better, you do better. I always have, and for me it’s always been true.
I can’t stay organized, I’m a major offender of tardiness, I’m not consistent with projects, or well anything. And I see my 13 year old forgetting his signed note, losing it somewhere and I can honestly say here, I don’t know. Did he lose it because I can’t teach him how not to, or did I lose and I have simply forgotten? That’s just a fraction of what these moments lead to.
How do you teach an 11 year old girl to embrace what you see is beautiful and unique inside of her when you have never really done that yourself? How do teach her not to accept less than she deserves, and stand up for her own dignity?
Children learn by watching. We always say that, but they’re watching us. All the time. And we’re always doing things we wish they won’t. And we can’t stop. Or don’t.
They say the world is made round so we will not see too far ahead. I suppose that is true because somehow we still have to sleep at night. I know I need it. A friend told me today that for her, ignorance is bliss. Well you know, sweet friend that is because you are not yet a mother. We cannot remain ignorant. This is a call to arms to my sisters, and my brothers, and mothers and fathers.
Learn 3 New things Every Single Day. Something about the world. About a friend or loved one. And something about yourself. Start there. And then take that something, and share it. Forgive yourself of your short comings my friends. I will try to do the same.
My dad one time said something to me about things he saw his own children doing, and realized he had handed down a world to us he didn’t understand.
And you know what? I don’t know today, even still a better father. Not kidding. He was fun, and still is. He smiled, and still does. He taught me to swim, how to throw a punch, how to read, and to love music. If I am going to learn something new today, I could bet my boots he’d be the first one I’d ask. And if he doesn’t have the answer, that’s ok, because he can get it from my mom.